Friday. 8.4.06 4:38 pm
Yo, it's been like a year since I've posted here. A year. Therefore I naturally feel like an outsider. I doubt that many people here now remember me, or have ever even known me. I am however very glad that I have not been totaly forgotten. DAVE has kindly left my little pixel guy on the island.
Point of this post? I think I'll start posting again. If anyone was on my AIM buddy list by the way, and hasn't heard from me in a LONG time, it's because my buddy list asploded on my faze. As in, it baleeted itself. j00 know? Anyway, just send me an IM and i can re-add you! Thanks!
The Nutang Podcast
Sunday. 10.30.05 11:10 am
It's Coming Soon. Keep checking here for updates. I'll edit this post when milestones are reached. ^_^
Tuesday. 8.2.05 11:38 pm
A few hours ago, while sitting back wile an ice cold bottle of coke waiting for XPPGY to activate, i noticed somthing. Somthing, very odd. This oddity was in fact so odd, that it baffled me. Now, I don't really know if you can really be baffled by an oddity but it seemed as if I was. Anyway, the strange thing that had tormented me so and caused me to enjoy my coke less, was the led zeppelin cd that was sitting on my desk.
'Why is this so odd?' you may cluelessly ask, unknowing of what kind of story could back such a pointless thing up. Well my friends the answer is clearer than you think. The fact is, I dont own a led zeppelin cd. Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against led zeppelin, I just don't have any of ther CD's. As i tried to figure out why it was there, thoughts of satanistic subliminal messages race hrough my head. It began to block my concentration. All i could hear was 'There was a toolshed where he made us suffer, sweet satin'. It began to creep me out.
Eventually, i could think of nothing but various subliminal messages. So i decided to look it up on the ultimate source of all things known and erotic, the internet. I found a number of sites with tons of subliminal messages, and I came across a few that seemed a bit odd. Or maybe even fake:
Pokemon: Yes, it seems that 4kids entertainment wants you to bite the apple as well. The song goes 'Gotta catch 'em all, Gotta catch 'em all YEAH!' so on and so forth. But if you play it backwards: 'Satin is good, satin is good. SATIN is good satin is..' You get the jist of it.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: It goes 'Turtles count it off, TURTLES' ect. But backwards, you hear 'Heroine is good for you SELTRUT!'. Hmm, those damn hippies!
The National anthem: 'Oh say can you see' may seem familliar, but what the government is really saying is: 'ees uoy nac yas ho'. I couldent belive it either folks. Those bastards! And i watched the inaguration!
And last but not least, the alltime favorite of tuns of bum low life kids: Yu GI OH!:
it goes '(i dunno how it goes)' but backwards, you'd be suprised to hear 'Yugi likes sex and drugs, so should YOU! Yugi's cool because he smokes pot, and [graphic adult content removed]' Eww...and i let my 13 year old watch this shit! GOD DAMMIT YOU FUCKIN KID!
-Until next time
Across The Pond (part: 1)
Friday. 7.22.05 12:20 pm
Well, after 2 long weeks of not updating my blog I'm here to, update my blog.
Before we begin you will need to understand a basic concept. England is a country. America is also a country. They are seperated by a big body of water called, The Atlantic Ocean.
Now that thats all cleared up I'll begin.
-One of my good english friends got back from his camp and called me up. "Wanna come hang out with me, my brother and friend alex from england?''. I accepted hastily, knowing that I needed to quickly get away from my boring house before i exploded in a big ball of bored flames. I put down the phone and walked over to his house. The walk was long. Painfully long. By car its only 5 minutes but damn is it a long walk.
Anyway when I arrived at my host's estate I found no-one around. I even threw stuff through his window, (which I would later blame on a mob of angry clansmen raiding everyhting in site, uhh...in New Jersey...hmmm) but to no avail. Then, suddenly my cell phone started blasting out a monophonic version of 'I wanna be sedated' and vibrated. Whenever my phone vibrates in my pocket, I hesitate. I think, 'what the hell, why are my pants vibrating' before finaly realising that its connected with the computerized sound of a phone company butchering a Ramones song.
I answered and heard, "oh yeah i forgot to tell you, were in town.' Oh good, I'll just walk all the way back to the bustop and bus there, i thought. Yeah right, like I was gunna do that! 'I'll wait right here unti that crap comes back, no more walkin' to bus stops for me' i thought.
When I got on the bus, I gave the guy my two bucks (it' cost 1.80) and i didnt have anywhere to put coins so i said "You can just keep the 20 cents or whatever". I must have done that rong, because the drive shruged and let out a small "Ha" implying 'yeah that'll help'. Not only that, but everyone in the first 5 rows leaned over and stared at me because of it, so I ended up sitting in the back.
When I got off the bus, I had to find my buds. Great, more walking. It only took me 10 minutes though, it turned out they were walking to meet me at the bustop. I met alex, and we went to eat lunch.
After lunch we got back on the bus and it was the same guy, and fromt he looks of it some of the same people too. 'Ugh,' i thought. I payed this time with exact change...and just walked away saying nothing. He remembered me, I could tell.
For the rest of the day we did basically nothing, sat around, played guitar, ate.
However, the following days were a bit different...
Junior High Deathmatch
Sunday. 7.3.05 5:30 pm
During that dreaded part of the year in which students must get off their asses at un-godly hours of the morning to be given examinations of their wit and yelled at by fat old ladies with no hair, much goes on under the cover of schoolwork. Many epic battles take place in the warzone known to most only as, The Campus.
The battling factions are none other than those infamous rival groups known as The Jocks, and The Dorks. As the day procedes, many dorks enjoy sitting, eating lunch, and talking to their friends. The Jocks on the other hand like to laugh really loud, punching each other, and beating the shit out of their peers whom are lower on the food chain. Why? Who knows. But it is a classic ritual that makes the insecure feel stronger.
A jock's rutine usually consists of beginning with somthing along the lines of, "Hey stupid fag, your stupid", "Wanna dance mother fucker?" or, "MY COCK IS REALLY HUGE!". Then he will procede to ruff the poor lonely straight a student up, and the kick in with a line like, "What now?" or "Whos your daddy?". Then the goon will leave the victim where he stands with a final punch to thee stomach.
But what if this was reversed? What if the hunter became the hunted, then became the hunter again, and then once more the hunted. (Or on the other hand, the hunted becomes the hunter, then is hunted once more before becoming the hunter again.) It just depends on how you look at it I suppose...
Oh Right, sorry for elaborating on that. Anyway, what if? Well lets see...
The Dork would say something like "Hey un-intellegent homosexual, your I.Q. is fucking low!", then knee the jock in thee crotch. But then the jock would pop up with a "Suck my hairy-" but get hit from behind by a buddy of the protaganist. Then the original attacker would finish the job by stepping on the unimportant waste of a life form while saying something such as, "Whos your biological father bitch?"
That would be awsome...too bad...
The History Of Dishy Sucubus
Tuesday. 6.28.05 1:29 pm
Recently I was asked by a buddy where my somewhat obscure internet alias (Dishy Sucubus) came from. Of course, I told him that i was too tired to tell him such a long story (which was true). But then, another being of somewhat higher significance asked me the same question. This is what I told him (More or less):
It all started one day when my cousin Ed and I were sitting around doing nothing but being lazy ass bums playing XBOX (XXX-Box in france). As i reached my hand into the jumbo bag of 'FatMan' brand pork rinds, i noticed a small card lying on my floor. I didn't pay much attention to it at first, but then it hit me! It had the number 2 on it in big bold font. 'I love the number two' I thought. So I put my controller down and tried to reach the lovely portarit of the greatest number in existance. But alas, I could not reach the divine card. My cousin suggested that I get up, and walk over to pick it up, but I wisely decided against such a dubious decision. I had a better idea anyway. I picked out the longest peice of fried pig fat i could find, and used it as an extension of my arm!. Brilliant!
Once I had grasped the plastic wonder I gazed lovingly at it for hours (12 seconds). Then i noticed something else about it. Yes, thats right, I read what it said. I know, I know, you may be thinking 'What a burdonsome act for a lazy shitbag' but i did it. And it read as follows:
2 MONTHS FREE OF X-BOX LIVE (XXX-Live-Box in france).
-Play with your friends over the internet!
-Pick up chicks!
Wow. I told Ed about what i had found and then slept for 3 hours. When I awoke, I decided to try and activate my 2 month subscription to the only service that lets your have babies WHILE playing video games. I entered my code and I was on my way!
First it asked me general info, you know birthdate, credit card info, sexual orientation, the usual. Then It asked me for a username that I would like to use. 'Hmm,' I thought 'What should I make as my user-AHAH!' I had it. Wait no, nevermind.
After hours of thinking (yes i said hours again, it must have been a few days already) I decided to just go with this nickname that my school baseball coach gave me. PattyMac. or maybe I should use my track nickname, TrattyTrac. Nah PattyMac 'll have to do.
So I entered it (and yes Ed laughed through that.) and it said, "Were sorry! Another Fag has allready taken that loser nickname, would you like to see similar usernames that are available." I selected yes and it gave me these options:
Wait what? WTF?
'What the fuck is a dishy sucubus' I thought. So i decided to researh it. (Google)
Apparently a Sucubus is this:
I found some other pictures too but, I didnt think they were "clean" enough to post.
'So lets see' I thought, 'I know what a dish is, and i guess a sucubus is some deamon chic who likes to kill shit, so I guess I'll hi-jack it!
And thus, Dishy Sucubus was born.
-Just so you know---->Now you Know
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